Just for the record, I’d like to state up front what I’m going to do in the next 31 days. I don’t want to chase you off, but if you are looking forward to advice for complicated step relationships, you won’t find that here. I won’t specifically be talking about a marriage that is unequally yoked either. If you are single and longing to be married, I don’t know much about that.
I may not be offering great advice for these circumstances specifically, but I will be exploring what a healthy marriage looks like, what the Bible prescribes for marriage, and how to get there. My real hope and prayer is that if you are part of Christian marriage that is less than the best, that this month of October just might be your month. I believe a bad marriage can become a good marriage, a good marriage can become better, and a new marriage can be spared many mistakes.
I’m a pastor’s wife and have been now for about twenty years. I’ve seen my share of messed up, so-called Christian marriages. I say “so-called” not to question the Christianity of any husband or wife that has come into my life, but I do wonder if these marriages made up of one Christian husband and one Christian wife are a wreck, then where is the disconnect?
Could it be that we don’t really know what a Christian marriage is supposed to look like or how it is to function, or how we as husbands and wives are supposed to approach our responsibilities to the most important of our earthly relationships? I don’t think anyone really wants to be involved in a bad marriage, nor is trying to sabotage theirs so they will ensure a bad one.
Instead, what I've found is that many husbands and wives suffer silently and put on their best face and try to suck it up and just do the best they can despite a marriage that’s rocky without any idea what to do to fix it. It’s not spiritually acceptable for Christians to have a bad marriage. In fact, it’s actually more of an expectation and assumption that a marriage between two Christians is going to be good, so many Christians suffer silently behind the façade of happily ever after, when the glare from the sunset has them blinded to everything except their need of help.
Have you and your spouse lost your way? If you have suffered silently with sadder ever after, disillusioned ever after, or even madder ever after, I invite you to click on by each day throughout the month. It might be frank. It might be funny. But hopefully, above all, it will be helpful. I’m hoping with a little bit of work, or a lot of work, we can all be a little closer to happier ever after by November.
Take Home: Are you willing to do what it takes to get from “here” to “there?” Is your spouse?